Covering part of the segment on hell for my Eschatology elective. I say part of because the largest segment in this is on hell. Seems misplaced. I really picked some hardcores to take an RCIA course from. They would view Vatican I as a conclave of fornicating homosexuals! I am not of a liberal mind here where my God has to be my buddy and has to follow my marshmellowy concept of justice, but this stuff is overkill.

I am forced, in this section to read an eighteen page diatribe on the tortures of hell. A concrete, literalistic interpretation of all references to hell. The fires of hell are literal fires that you burn in constantly forever and are super-duper intense – beyond any fire we’ve experienced or can possibly imagine. The thirst is a literal thirst but beyond thirst that a mortal man can imagine, same with hunger. On top of this, in an earlier reading on the CCC we learn that the chief punishment, of suffering, of hell is eternal separation of God. And then there are the vile odors, plagues of demons, the company of suffering tormented sinners as yourself and many more things besides this.

Seems a lot to focus on, doesn’t it? Now, I’m not the queazy, modern type, I understand the logic of hell. But such a description as this priest tries to paint ends up falling under its own weight. Most of the torments of hell described here are physical torments. Would not the torment of eternal separation from God require not being so eternally distracted with all this burning and starving and thirst? Seems I am to be kept quite distracted from ever thinking about the lack of beatific vision.

It reminds me of the second Matrix movie. The climax of the first movie was an awesome fight between Neo and Agent Smith. So, for the second movie, they thought “what could be more awesome?” so they had Neo fight a hundred of them in a CGI fest that was 1/100th the tension of the one on one of the first film.

I think a real vision of hell would be a lot quieter, darker, drab, and acute in its lack of feeling, not in its intensity.


So, I chose my elective for the Neverending RCIA program. I went by the rational choice – the shortest one. Also, probably, the coolest, or most interesting one – eschatology.

Also, probably, the most significant of the available choices of the electives. The others were: Apologetics, Morality, Catholic Philosophy, The Holy Spirit, Introduction to Catholicism (sort of a weird choice after what I just took) The Church Councils (that was the longest course) Mariology, Marriage Preparation (like I need that in my 28th year!) and a few others I can’t remember.

The most significant being eschatology because it was one of the fault lines of my atheistic faith. [Atheistic faith? How dare you! I’m based on science! Son, let me show you the fairy dust upon which you sit…]

The Ape Theory or Maggot Theory (that you simply rot at the end) was a road to nihilism. Not an active nihilism but a dead end nihilism. That the universe, by a series of miracles to shame all mysticism, evolved a species such as man that operates by Ends possessed no more end than a fruit fly is a gaff to shake the foundations of the cosmos with laughter.

The Maggot Theory renders most, if not all, morality moot. [Mind, this is only of one topic, there is the whole origin of the universe and many other things as well.] If, upon this accidental ball of metal and mud, where, ultimately meaning is meaningless (under the ultimate annihilation by our sun, and it in its turn by extinction and the crushing or freezing death of a lifeless cosmos) you are to fend against a ticking clock against other accidents, where and what is morality? An countless series of means to end, for no end. Why chance anything that our cherished virtues demand?

Honesty? Only when it is safe to do so, brother. And only if I benefit. A case can be made, and not with too much difficulty, that I should not lie to the disadvantage of the other, that I should not use dishonesty as a weapon, that I should not seek to profit by deception. But where are those Jews? They are right up those stairs – and Hail Hitler. They will die, and maybe the accidents of the accidental earth that produced the Accidental Man through a series of random mutations may hurt inside to have helped in the death of others. But surely, the Accidental Ape will get over it far easier than death. And death is what he will risk.

Likewise, the Accidental Man may feel great guilt for not saving his wife when you were both held up by robbers. But you fled leaving her to die. But surely he can get over this easier than he can his own death. But what allegiance should I feel to what some scientists, or, rather, gadflies, to an instinct to perpetuate my genes – or whatever may be the cause of Accidental Man’s guilt? That one feels these things because evolution has instilled it in him to maintain a familial bond for the propagation of the species? Here’s the answer to that.

Shrug. Fuck it.

Again, arguments can be made that doesn’t descend Accidental Man into a raving lunatic bent on murdering all in sight for his insatiable ends. Although, such Accidental Men have certainly existed! But Accidental Man can allow nothing into his vision that interferes with his survival.

This assumes, of course, that Accidental Man is clear in the TruthTm of himself and the world he lives in. And that he is free of influence from those ignorant superstitions that lure him to stick his mortal neck out. To stave off the seeking of pleasure, to endure hardship, to take action whereupon he does not profit.

Such a fully awakened Ape sees the world for all that it is. There is no reason for his being there. No necessity for his having existed or for him to continue to exist. Or for anyone else to have existed or to exist. That all is some inexplicable chain of events that his scientists claim started at some point in time for no reason and by no means and from a nothing that is a something – somehow. Thus, the Jews meet their fate, Accidental Man moves up a square. Wife dies, moves up a square.

Think of all the things Accidental Man can do now! Ejaculation feels great. Its awesome! Why not do it as much as possible? The only restraint is the need to hold off when the sensation is abused and thrill subsides and then its back to the pole after a period of waiting. Look at that sweet, supple girl over there. Screw the propagation of the species, I didn’t sign for that and it matters not when my Accidental Existence accidentally stops existing. And who cares if the wife be sad and angry (or the husband – for there be the Accidental Woman too) that just evolution and it is a blind mechanism with no future.

That is the conflict that the modern man half Accidental Awoke Man and half influenced by the superstitious, but non-accidental philosophy has to contend with. Or, as is more traditionally put: he has an Angel in one ear, and the Devil in the other.

Hence, eschatology is the right subject for me to choose as an elective.

If you wonder why this seems to end abruptly, it is that I stop writing when the wife wakes up and so wherever I am at I tie it up and leave. Bye!

New Acquisition

C.S. Lewis Space Trilogy

Got a normal weekend and went to the bookstore. Because that is where you go to spend your money, dummy!

This is actually an old acquisition. I don’t typically reread books, and so after reading these a number of years ago, I recycled them at Half Priced Books. However, these books still haunt my memory especially its vivid imagery.

The ocean scenes in Perelandra still loom in my mind when I think of them. So after 1984, it is time to revisit the adventures of Dr Ransom!

Still working

Haven’t had a day off in eleven days. And I missed one question in the Easter module of my RCIA class ( yes, I am still in this infernal thing!) and so, when I am done with the entire course before I take the final I have to submit a form to retake take a test I scored 91% on.

With all their fucking talk about how you better be in a state of grace if you should die, you would think they wouldn’t make it fucking impossible to join!

It’s like studying for a doctorate. Sorry, but if they think this is anything approaching religion, they can suck my balls. I had it a BILLION times easier attaining my medical coding and billing certification and that took me eighteen months of all day study!

Back to Work

I started work last week. Posting will be light for a time. The load at work has me there for thirteen ten hour shifts straight (perhaps more, they haven’t said yet when the next day off is). And, of course it is summer in the south so all most of he off hours is spent controlling vegetation. A weed can grow a foot here overnight – I AM NOT EXAGGERATING!!

And, lastly I am still trying to finish this online RCIA class. I have six modules left plus (as I just found out) an elective course that I have to purchase and pass if I want my certificate. These are the tough modules with Summa readings and tests, and the forty or so pages of CCC, scripture and excursions into private revelations, the Dolorous Passion, Shroud of Turn vs. the veil,of Veronica. And. Trillion other topics (oh did I forget to mention reading the entirety of Fulton Sheen’s Life of Christ?) that NO ONE at any parish anywhere on earth has to cover in such long pain staking detail. And then just when you want to forget you ever heard the word Catholic or Pope or perhaps even the name Christ, you have to submit a form to have a test sent to you and then have someone grade it.

If the Catholic Church made everybody who wanted in take this course they would be a fraction of the size of the Church of Satan.

Going Back to Work

Going back to my job. Funny thing, I had started looking for work by going to the same temp agency I went through when I first moved to NC. On their website is an advertisement for my job! Whoa, what? That ain’t happening. So I called my job and told HR, I’m bored. So I start tomorrow.

Sadly, I got little done that I thought I was going to. However, I now feel compelled to get things done as I did not when I was off of work. Of course, who know what is worth pursuing since it also seems we are going to dismantle our world, put in a shell of a man in the White House to push in a retarded revolution of retards. Sorry, it is not worth my effort to think of a better description of such enemies as we have destroying our country.

I wonder if it will go far enough that they’ll just start killing white people with the help of white people? Crazy? You should take another look at history, brother. Although no time in history matches the nihilism and outright lack of morals as this one.

You also may be behind the times. Check out this website designed to teach you, white people, how despicable you are.

And this vomit-worthy production:

Yeah, that’s right, one of the things is getting to work on time. That’s white! So is reason and logic and science. It is insulting to non-whites. If you are not already twisted into some monstrosity of unreason, you will see how utterly racist this is and how horribly it treats of non-white peoples. You couldn’t get this low with southern KKK in the nineteenth century.

So, yeah, I am going back to work. At least I’ll have less time to see it all burn.

Newest Reading Adventures

Seems all I do is post about what I am currently reading. Oh well, better than other possibilities I suppose!

Readers here know I love the writing of Flannery O’Connor, this is her first novel. She only wrote two I believe in her short life. I read The Violent Bear it Away a few weeks ago. I didn’t leave a review because, and this isn’t easy to explain, I didn’t experience it in a way that allows for a review. I grasped the arc of the novel near the very end and then it evaporated from my grasp. It left the equivalent of a sense impression upon my mind. It was a good, dark read, that is all I can say.

The next book I read, I believe, in 1984 for reading class.

I haven’t read it since then. I can spot a reference to the book quite easily but the details of the story are fuzzy to me. Except the end, you don’t forget the end.

I felt it was a book that is getting timely… more and more timely. Reading the first chapter, I am sure of it. The Two-Minute hate scene. The equivalent now is the wide-spread TDS (Trump Derangement Syndrome) and the hate-mobs and cancel culture that pervade the social media.

New Acquisition

Actually got this a couple of weeks ago, but was too busy reading it to post about it.

The Word on Fire Bible

It is a beautiful Bible (technically this is a series and this installment is only the four gospels, 600 pages of the four gospels). There is commentary from church fathers and Bishop Barron (who has a knack for being concise and very clear). There is classic, beautiful artwork from the masters in it with essays about the works.

It has something that a lot of Bible commentaries and study Bibles fail at is explanation towards an understanding of the text, what it means. Study Bibles are usually buried in historical method and thus the commentaries are squabbles over whether Matthew actually wrote Matthew. If anyone has ever read these sorts of books, one knows that they are usually pointless discussions, wrong, and usually contradicted by the next book you read. Meanwhile, what the meaning of the Transfiguration, or what various parts of the Sermon on the Mount meant, or how it relates to you, the reader, is entirely missed.

It also navigates the forest and trees pretty well. Again some study Bibles go into great detail about each chapter without ever coming to an understanding of it – except to note that this scholar disagrees with that scholar, and some are so over arching that key parts that are not obvious go by completely unmentioned. I think this Bible does a very good job of hitting a lot of the important major chords.

And the art work, did I mention the art work is superb.

I can’t wait for Bishop Barron’s treatment of the rest of the NT as well as the OT!

Highly recommended!