Category Archives: Star Wars

The Force Awakens – Revisited

Last Monday, nearly a month after seeing it the first time, I went back and watched it early in the morning. I have to say I had a much better impression of it the second time I watched it than the first time. That is certainly something I could never get myself to do with the prequels.

One of the things I had against it the first time is the usual, modern, spectacle of skinny little girls beating up men. But, on review, before she got what I have to call a Force infusion, she engaged in no upper body combat, merely kicking and a staff. That’s alright, I can buy that.

I know it is heretical to say nowadays, but girls are not as physically strong as boys. So I need a good explanation as to why a waif is sending men to the floor. Trinity in The Matrix had a very good reason – she was in the Matrix. If she was doing that to giant goons in the real world, I would have laughed.

I still have a problem with her being able to do all manner of things for which there is, as yet, little explanation. One hopes that the new guy on the film is not a drooling retard and realizes that he has to come up with a way cool power for Luke that enables him to virtually train Jedi from afar…

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The Force Awakens… Tired and Confused

Star_Wars_Episode_VII_The_Force_Awakens

So I saw The Force Awakens on Christmas Eve.

Based on initial viewing – meh.

First the good points (and I’m going to be quick).

It did not look like the prequels, it had the look (so far as you can try such a thing) and feel (you can never really go back…) of the originals.

Also I knew as soon as the usual episode scroll rides to the top of the screen that we were not going to get bogged down in senate debates and Jedi council meetings, and conversations that take place on a couch, etc. We were going to get what we came for.

Unfortunately that brings right to the bad. I was almost, no I was, hoping for a council meeting, a senate debate or something. This was a JJ Abrams Star Wars, all guff and action and not a single attempt to explain anything.

Now explanation is not always necessary. In movies in particular, if you can express it through action instead of explanation through dialogue, that is the proper way. In Return of the Jedi we needed no explanation to know what is going on behind the mask as the Emperor is electrocuting his son before his eyes.

But The Force Awakens, as  I said, is a JJ Abrams film, he delights in doing things that have to have an explanation and then refuses to do so. It is as if the man enjoys pushing people out of the world of his own films.

Firstly, the trailers for The Force Awakens all had the black storm trooper (he is black when he takes off that helmet, his uniform is as any other stormtrooper) he looks like a man that has just suddenly emerged from a terrorizing nightmare. We are led to believe that this is the person of the new trilogy. But it is not, it belongs to some little girl. A girl who serves the modernly well-worn bromidic falsehood that little girls can fight and defeat men twice her size.

And that would be fine, if we were given some plausible (plausible here is plausible by the rules of the world created) reason for why she can do this. For instance, waif, Carrie Moss’s character, Trinity, in The Matrix Continue reading


No, I Actually Haven’t Yet (and then I start rambling about the prequels again…)

Luke-trial

No, I haven’t been to see the new Star Wars yet. I am a Jedi, I will see it in all patience when the time comes! Really though the wife doesn’t want to get sardined into an overpacked theater with a thousand cell phones. So I’ll wait until she’s ready.

She better not wait long. I’ve heard almost nothing but good things about it. It has a 95% rating at Rotten Tomatoes (which is one more than The Empire Strikes Back). Not infallible, but pretty impressive… most impressive. I doubt Abrams has beat out Empire for best Star Wars film (although he did have one of the screenwriters from Empire, Lawrence Kasdan) and I think it more that people are starved for even a decent (speculating, haven’t seen it yet) Star Wars installment after Lucas spent 8 years taking a giant dump on some of our childhoods.

I am assuming he stayed away from annoying children’s characters and fart and poodoo jokes and the like. George Lucas got the wrong idea about his films at some point (you can see it in The Return of the Jedi – teddy bears defeat the Imperial forces? really?). While the films were suitable for children to view, they were not by that fact children films. Herbie the Love Bug was a children’s film plain and simple.

Actually, one could contest whether the Star Wars films were ever suitable for children (at least below a certain age). You are talking about a monster (Darth Vader was a mechanical monster, half man, half machine) that ran an Empire of Nazi/totalitarian themes (Stormtroopers) who burnt some poor farm kids aunt and uncle to a crisp. An old wizard that gets cut down. And, let’s not forget a holocaust when a million (billion?) people are murdered by a giant laser. The body count in the original Star Wars was probably the biggest ever. Not onscreen, but still.

The second movie was even darker although the body count went down. We find that the monster who has just cut off the farm boy’s hand is his father. How’s that for an idea in a young kids mind? We have torture and not just torture, but torture for no reason. As Han said when his torture was over, “they didn’t even ask me any questions.”

The word for today kids is Sadism! Say it after me.

I’m not saying a kid couldn’t watch it, but saying it was intended for children from its inception just makes me wonder what kind of sick person you are then. Genocide? That’s a children’s theme for ya.

Lucas continued and intensified this confusion in his slipshod and confused prequels. Where in the same series you have the fart jokes for kids and the lizard poo poo jokes and the kid-friendly (but adult enraging) characters in a movie with the slaughter of who knows how many children. Numerous severed limbs. Pure evil, extermination of an entire class (the Jedi).

The prequels didn’t even have the benefit of being uplifting in any way like Continue reading


Where is Luke Skywalker?

TheForceAwakens-poster

I am sure my father wishes I had grown up by now, but I really just can’t help but get excited about a new Star Wars movie. Not even George Lucas (to say nothing of maturity (or lack thereof)) and his prequels can’t get it down too much. This is, after all the story we really care about. The one that should have come after the originals. IF! If there were further movies to be made. There did not have to be. I would have been perfectly content with the originals UNMOLESTED!

So it was with no small amount of gushing that I saw the movie poster! Although I will curb my enthusiasm. I thought the Star Trek reboots with JJ Abrams to be pretty forgettable. That was a reboot, however, this is not.

I hope they don’t screw up these movies. Luke Skywalker was my childhood hero – well, from seven through eleven or so.

But onto the subject of the post. And it is just a trivial thing. There is no Luke Skywalker that I can see on that poster. Where is he? Or is he on that poster? Is he the guy at the top? That would – could – make for one hell of a story!

Let’s hope those questions were worth asking after December 19th.

Two Months!